The Ghouls
drink, just to keep the damp out, and as they could not very well take the coffin inside with them, they stood it up against the wall outside, Crass remarking with a laugh, there was not much danger of anyone pinching it. Just as they finished drinking the two half-pints there was a loud crash outside, and rushing out they found that the coffin had blown down and was lying bottom upwards across the pavement, while the black cloth that had been wrapped round it was out in the middle of the muddy road. Having recovered this, they shook off as much of the dirt as they could, and once more wrapping it round the coffin resumed their journey to the mortuary, where they found Hunter waiting for them engaged in earnest conversation with the keeper. The electric light was switched on, and they saw that the marble slab was empty.
'Snatchum came this afternoon with a handtruck and a corfin,' explained the keeper. 'I was out at the time, and the missis thought it was all right, so she let him have the key.'
Hunter and Crass looked blankly at each other.
'Well, this takes the biskit!' said the latter as soon as he could speak.
'I thought you said you had settled everything all right with the old woman?' said Hunter.
'So I did,' replied Crass; 'I seen 'er on Friday, and I told 'er to leave it all to me to attend to, and she said she would. I told 'er that Philpot said to me that if ever anything appened to 'im I was to take charge of everything for 'er, because I was 'is best friend. And I told 'er we'd do it as cheap as possible.'
'Well, it seems to me as you've bungled it somehow,' said Nimrod gloomily. 'I ought to have gone and seen 'er myself. I was afraid you'd make a mess of it,' he added in a wailing tone. 'It's always the same; everything that I don't attend to myself goes wrong.'
An uncomfortable silence followed. Crass thought that the principal piece of bungling in this affair was Hunter's failure to secure possession of the coroner's certificate after the inquest, but he was afraid to say so.
'I can see 'ow it's been worked,' said Crass at last; 'there's one of the members of the club who works for Snatchum, and 'e's took it on 'isself to give the order for the funeral; but 'e's got no right to do it.'
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