Page:Select miscellany.pdf/8

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8

to mak the experiment, wha kens but I micht succeed to a miracle? On stepping back to my ain house, the first thing I did was to tak a thimblefu’ of whisky, by way of gi’eing me a pickle spunk, in case of ony fresh rumpus wi’ the wife, and also to clear up my ideas—for I hae fand, that after a lang spell at the loom the thochts as weel as the body, are like to get stupid and dozey. So I taks a drappie, and sits down quietly by the fireside, waiting for the return of Maggy frae scolding Mrs Todd about the flour.

In she comes, a’ in a flurry. Her face was as red as a peeyny rose, her breathing came fast, and she lookit a’thegither like ane that has had a sair warslo wi’ the tongue. But she was far frae being downcast. On the contrair, she lookit as proud as a Turkey cock; and I saw wi’ the tail o’ my e’e that she had gained a grand victory ower puir Mrs Todd, "who was a douce, quiet woman, and nae match for the like of her in randying. So she began to stump and mak a great phrase about the way she had outerawed the puir body; and was a’thegither as upset about it, as if Duke Hamilton had made her keeper of his palace. Losh, I was mad to hear’t, and twa or three times had a gude mind to put in a word—to sic a degree was my courage raised by the drap spirits—but aye as the words were rising to my mouth, the thocht of the can and the dressing sent them back again, till they stuck like a bane in my throat. Very likely I micht hae said neer a word, and Andrew Brand’s advice micht hae gain for naething, had it no been for the cratur Nancy, who was sac lifted up about her mither’s dispute, that naething would sair her but to hae the haill affair mentioned cut and dry.