Page:Side talks with girls (1895).djvu/139

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Your Own Familiar Friend
127

what I would like to do would be to suggest to her how to thoroughly enjoy these companions, and how to be so careful in her conduct with them that there will be no possibility of her being disillusioned.

When two girls are very intimate, and count out of this intimacy not only their own sisters but all their other friends, they are apt, unconsciously, to cultivate the faults of selfishness, of meanness, and to cause an undesirable morbidness to spring up. You think, perhaps, I shouldn't have used the word meanness, and yet I'll tell you why I say it. You two have a long talk together about everything and everybody, and consequently you do not hesitate to criticise severely every little fault, every little weakness of your neighbors, although you never stop to remember what was said about the mote and the beam. If it were not for this very great intimacy you would not dream of shaking ill of others; if nothing else restrained you the fear that what you say might be repeated would have much to do with making you careful, but this great friendship, so-called, permits you to give license to your tongue, and you do not hesitate to utter before your bosom friend words and opinions which you would be ashamed to have other people know even entered your mind. Too great intimacy begets too great familiarity. Books and stories are often giggled over between