Page:The Enormous Room.pdf/134

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Apollyon
123

'Pourquoi?' thundered the Directeur.—'Because it's undrinkable,' the maitre de chambre said quietly.—'Undrinkable? Nonsense!' cried the Directeur furiously.—'Be so good as to taste it, Monsieur le Directeur.'—' I taste it? Why should I taste it? The coffee is perfectly good, plenty good for you men. This is ridiculous—'—'Why don't we all taste it?' suggested the Surveillant ingratiatingly.—'Why, yes,' said the Visitor mildly.—'Taste it? Of course not. This is ridiculous and I shall punish—'—'I should like, if you don't mind, to try a little,' the Visitor said.—'Oh, well, of course, if you like,' the Directeur mildly agreed. 'Give me a cup of that coffee, you!'—'With pleasure, sir,' said the maitre de chambre. The Directeur—M'sieu' Jean, you would have burst laughing—seized the cup, lifted it to his lips, swallowed with a frightful expression (his eyes almost popping out of his head) and cried fiercely, 'DELICIOUS!' The Surveillant took a cupful; sipped; tossed the coffee away, looking as if he had been hit in the eyes, and remarked, 'Ah.' The maitre de chambre—M'sieu' Jean he is clever—scooped the third cupful from the bottom of the pail, and very politely, with a big bow, handed it to the Visitor; who took it, touched it to his lips, turned perfectly green, and cried out 'Impossible!' M'sieu' Jean, we all thought—the Directeur and the Surveillant and the maitre de chambre and myself—that he was going to vomit. He leaned against the wall a moment, quite green; then recovering said faintly—'The Kitchen.' The Directeur looked very nervous and shouted, trembling all over, 'Yes, indeed! We'll see the cook about this perfectly impossible coffee. I had no idea that my men were getting such coffee. It's abominable! That's what it is, an outrage!'—And they all tottered downstairs to The Cook; and M'sieu Jean, they searched the kitchen; and what do you think? They found ten pounds of coffee and twelve pounds of sugar all neatly hidden away, that The Cook had been saving for himself out of our allowance. He's a beast, the Cook!"

I must say that, although the morning coffee improved