Page:The Female-Impersonators 1922 book scan.djvu/151

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Blarney Triumphant.
125

rat. And my silence would all the more make him hanker after the magic place where one could see his dough swell five-fold at a sitting.

After the first hour of blarney, I asked Abe to let me show him some of the sights of the Tenderloin, which all red-blooded Reubs hanker to see. "I swan!" he exclaimed. "I never believed such charming and handsome ladies existed!" I next took him to the Waldorf to dine. Of course I did not let him pay out a cent. Only one red-blooded hay-seed out of a hundred will, at the last, balk at sitting down at the card table, where I can get every penny back with interest at 10,000 per cent. We sharpwitted fellows have to take those chances, Jennie.

As we swilled such grub as Abe had never even smelled of, he rubbernecked at the wonderful frescoes and stared at the polished marble columns which made the great dining-room like a forest. "This place is like what I have dreamed heaven to be!" he broke out over and over again. He was so soft! "You are awful good, Mr. McDonald, to bring me to see all these heavenly things. I never believed there lived such an awf ul good fellow!".... Hah-hah-hah, Jennie! He was clean daft!

But, Jennie, I would never humbug a friend that way. Specially you, because you and I are "best friends." You see, Jennie, Abe Myers was a stranger with a big wad. I was loading him with favors and pulling the wool over his eyes because my plan was to wring him dry before I let him get out of my hands. Such tricks are what we smarter straight men of Fourteenth Street are for. We have to live off the greenhorns.....