Page:The Great American Fraud (Adams).djvu/72

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Getting a Testimonial from a Physician.

"He next asked me if I would give him a testimonial regarding Duffy's Whiskey. I said I did not do such things, as it was against my principles to do so. 'But this is not for publication,' he said. I replied that I had used but little of it, and found it only the same as any other whisky. He then asked if I was satisfied with the results as far as I had used it. I replied that I was. He then asked me to state that much, and I very foolishly said I would, on condition that it was not to be used as an advertisement, and he assured me it would not be used. I then, in a few words, said that 'I (or we) have used and are using Duffy's Malt Whiskey, and are satisfied with the results,' signing my name to the same. He left here, and what was my surprise to receive later on a booklet in which was my testimonial and many others, with cuts of hospitals ranging along with people who had reached 100 years by use of the whiskey, while seemingly all ailments save ringbone and spavin were being cured by this wonderful beverage. I was provoked, but was paid as I deserved for allowing a smooth tongue to deceive me. Duffy's Malt Whiskey has never been inside this place since that day and never will be while I have any voice to prevent it. The total amount used at the time and before was less than half a gallon."

This hospital is still used as a reference by the Duffy people.

Many of the ordinary testimonials which come unsolicited to the extensively advertised nostrums in great numbers are both genuine and honest. What of their value as evidence?

Some years ago, so goes a story familiar in the drug trade, the general agent for a large jobbing house declared that he could put out an article possessing not the slightest remedial or stimulant properties, and by advertising it skillfully so persuade people of its virtues that it would receive unlimited testimonials to the cure of any disease for which he might choose to exploit it. Challenged to a bet, he became a proprietary owner. Within a year he had won his wager with a collection of certified "cures" ranging from anemia to pneumonia. Moreover, he found his venture so profitable that he pushed it to the extent of thousands of dollars of profits. His "remedy" was nothing but sugar. I have heard "Kaskine" mentioned as the "cure" in the case. It answers the requirements, or did answer them at that time, according to an analysis by the Massachusetts State Board of Health, which shows that its purchasers had been paying $1 an ounce for pure granulated sugar. Whether "Kaskine" was indeed the subject of this picturesque bet, or whether it was some other harmless fraud, is immaterial to the point, which is that were the disease cures itself, as nearly all diseases do, the medicine gets the benefit of this vix medicatrix naturaæ - the natural corrective force which makes for normal health in every human organism. Obviously, the sugar testimonials can not be regarded as very weighty evidence.

Testimonials for a Magic Ring.

There is being advertised now a finger ring which by the mere wearing cures any form of rheumatism. The maker of that ring has genuine letters from people who believe that they have been cured it. Would any one other than a believer in witchcraft accept those statements? Yet they are just as "genuine" as the bulk of patent medicine letters and written in as good faith. A very small proportion of the gratuitous indorsements get into the newspapers, because, as I have said, they do not lend themselves