10
Chorus.He's got her on the list— he's got her on the list;
And I don't think she'll be missed— I'm sure she'll not be missed!
And that Nisi Prius nuisance, who just now is rather rife,
The Judicial humorist— I've got him on the list!
All funny fellows, comic men, and clowns of private life—
They'd none of 'em be missed— they'd none of 'em be missed
And apologetic statesmen of a compromising kind,
Such as— what d'ye call him— Thing'em-bob, and likewise— Never mind,
And 'St— 'st— 'st— and What's-his-name, and also You-know-who—
The task of filling up the blanks I'd rather leave to you.
But it really doesn't matter whom you put upon the list,
For they'd none of 'em be missed— they'd none of 'em be missed!
Chorus.You may put 'em on the list— you may put 'em on the list;
And they'll none of 'em be missed— they'll none of 'em be missed!
Enter Pooh-Bah.
Ko. Pooh-Bah, it seems that the festivities in connection with my approaching marriage must last a week. I should like to do it handsomely, and I want to consult you as to the amount I ought to spend upon them.
Pooh. Certainly. In which of my capacities? As First Lord of the Treasury, Lord Chamberlain, Attorney-General, Chancellor of the Exchequer, Privy Purse, or Private Secretary?
Ko. Suppose we say as Private Secretary.
Pooh. Speaking as your Private Secretary, I should say that as the city will have to pay for it, don't stint yourself— do it well.
Ko. Exactly— as the city will have to pay for it. That is your advice.
Pooh. As Private Secretary. Of course you will understand that, as Chancellor of the Exchequer, I am bound to see that due economy is observed.
Ko. Oh! But you said just now "don't stint yourself, do it well."
Pooh. As Private Secretary.
Ko. And now you say that due economy must be observed.
Pooh. As Chancellor of the Exchequer.
Ko. I see. Come over here, where the Chancellor can't hear us. (They cross the stage.) Now, as my Solicitor, how do you advise me to deal with this difficulty?
Pooh. Oh. as your Solicitor, I should have no hesitation in saying "chance it—"
Ko. Thank you. (Shaking his hand.) I will.
