35
His teeth, I've enacted,
Shall all be extracted
By terrified amateurs
The music-hall singer attends a series
Of masses and fugues and "ops"
By Bach, interwoven
With Spohr and Beethoven,
At classical Monday Pops.
The billiard sharp whom anyone catches,
His doom's extremely hard—
He's made to dwell—
In a dungeon cell
On a spot that's always barred.
And there he plays extravagant matches
In fitless finger-stalls
On a cloth untrue,
With a twisted cue
And elliptical billiard balls!
My object all sublime, &c.
Enter Pooh-Bah, Ko-Ko and Pitti-Sing. All kneel.
(Pooh-Bah hands a paper to Ko-Ko.)
Ko. I am honoured in being permitted to welcome your Majesty. I guess the object of your Majesty's visit— your wishes have been attended to. The execution has taken place.
Mik. Oh, you've had an execution, have you?
Ko. Yes. The Coroner has just handed me his certificate.
Pooh. I am the Coroner. (Ko-Ko hands certificate to Mikado.)
Mik. And this is the certificate of his death. (Reads.) "At Titipu, in the presence of the Lord Chancellor, Lord Chief Justice, Attorney-General, Secretary of State for the Home Department, Lord Mayor, and Groom of the Second Floor Front—"
Pooh. They were all present, your Majesty. I counted them myself.
Mik. Very good house. I wish I'd been in time for the performance.
Ko. A tough fellow he was, too— a man of gigantic strength. His struggles were terrific. It was really a remarkable scene.
Mik. Describe it.
TRIO and CHORUS.—Pitti-Sing, Ko-Ko, Pooh-Bah, and Chorus.
Ko.The criminal cried, as he dropped him down.
In a state of wild alarm—
With a frightful, frantic, fearful frown,
