Page:The Naval Officer (1829), vol. 2.djvu/246

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240
THE NAVAL OFFICER.

I knew its heinousness, I transgressed..and repented; habit was. all-powerful in me; and the only firm support I could have looked to for assistance was, unfortunately, very superficially attended to. Religion, for. any good. purposes, was scarcely in my thoughts. My system was a sort of Socratic heathen philosophy—a moral code, calculated to take a man tolerably safe through a quiet world, but not to extricate him from a labyrinth of long-practised iniquity.

The thoughtless and. vicious conduct of my companions became to me a source of serious reflection. Far from following their example, I felt myself some degrees better than they were; and in the pride of my heart thanked God that. I was not like these publicans. My pharisaical arrogance concealed from me the mortifying fact: that I was much worse, and. with very slight hopes of amendment. Humility had not yet entered my mind; but it was the only basis on which any religious improvement could be created—the only chance of being saved. I