Page:The Pilgrim's Progress, the Holy War, Grace Abounding Chunk3.djvu/19

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Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners.
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then I should repent, and say I was sorry for it, and promise God to do better next time, and there got help again; for then I thought I pleased God well as any man in England.

31. Thus I continued about a year, all which time our neighbours did take me to be a very godly and religious man, and did marvel much to see such great alteration in my life and manners. And indeed it was, though I knew not Christ, nor grace, nor faith, nor hope; for, I have since seen, had I then died my state had been most fearful.

32. But, I say, my neighbours were amazed at this my great conversion from prodigious profaneness to something like a moral life and sober man. Now, therefore, they began to praise, to commend, and to speak well of me, both to my face and behind my back. Now I was, as they said, become godly; now I was become a right honest man. But oh, when I understood those were their words and opinions of me, it pleased me mighty well I for though as yet I was nothing but a poor painted hypocrite, yet I loved to be talked of as one that was truly godly. I was proud of my godliness, and indeed I did all I could either to be seen or well spoken of by men. And thus I continued for about a twelve month or more.

33. Now you must know that before this I had taken much delight in ringing; but my conscience beginning to be tender, I thought such practice was but vain, and therefore forced myself to leave it. Yet my mind hankered; wherefore I would go to the steeple-house and look on, though I durst not ring. But I thought this did not become religion neither; yet I forced myself, and would look on still. But quickly after I began to think, "How if one of the bells should fall?" Then I chose to stand under a main beam that lay overthwart the steeple from side to side, thinking here I might stand sure. But then, I thought again, should the bell fall with a swing it might first hit the wall, and then rebounding upon me might kill me for all this beam. This made me stand in the steeple