Page:The Portrait of a Lady (1882).djvu/106

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98
THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY.
98

98 THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY. " Perhaps I might," the girl replied. This suggestion gave her something more definite to rest upon than she had found in her own thoughts, and the fact of her uncle's genial shrewdness being associated with her dilemma seemed to prove to her that she was concerned with the natural and reasonable emotions of life, and not altogether a victim to intellectual eagerness and vague ambitions ambitions reaching beyond Lord Warburton's handsome offer to something inde- finable and possibly not commendable. Tn so far as the indefinable had an influence upon Isabel's behaviour at this juncture, it was not the conception, however unformulated, of a union with Caspar Goodwood ; for however little she might have felt warranted in lending a receptive ear to her English suitor, she was at least as far removed from the disposition to . let the young man from Boston take complete possession of her. The sentiment in which she ultimately took refuge, after reading his letter, was a critical view of his having come abroad for it was part of the influence he had upon her that he seemed to take from her the sense of freedom. There was something too forcible, something oppressive and restrictive, in the manner in which he presented himself. She had been haunted at moments by the image of his disapproval, and she had wondered a consideration she Had never paid in one equal degree to any one else whether he would like what she did. The difficulty was that more than any man she had ever known, more than poor Lord Warburton (she had begun now to give his lordship the benefit of this epithet), Caspar Goodwood gave her an impression of energy. She might like it or not, but at any rate there was something very strong about him ; even in one's usual contact with him one had to reckon with it. The idea of a diminished liberty was particularly disagreeable to Isabel at present, because it seemed to her that she had just given a sort of personal accent to her independence by making up her mind to refuse Lord Warburton. Sometimes Caspar Goodwood had seemed to range himself on the side of her destiny, to be the stubbornest fact she knew ; she said to herself at such moments that she might evade him for a time, but that she must make terms with him at last terms which would be certain to be favourable to himself. Her impulse had been to avail herself of

the things that helped her to resist such an obligation ; and this

impulse had been much concerned in her eager acceptance of her aunt's invitation, which had come to her at a time when she expected from day to day to see Mr. Goodwood, anpl when she was glad to have an answer ready for something she was sure he