Page:The Portrait of a Lady (1882).djvu/239

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THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY.
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THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY. 231 should forsake my natural mission if I were to settle in Florence." " A woman's natural mission is to be where she is most appreciated." " The point is to find out where that is." " Very true a woman often wastes a great deal of time in the inquiry. People ought to make it very plain to her." " Such a matter would have to be made very plain to me," said Isabel, smiling. " I am glad, at any rate, to hear you talk of settling. Madame Merle had given me an idea that you were of a rather roving disposition. I thought she spoke of your having some plan of going round the world." " I am rather ashamed of my plans ; I make a new one every day." " I don't see why you should be ashamed ; it's the greatest of pleasures." " It seems frivolous, I think," said Isabel. " One ought to choose something very deliberately, and be faithful to that." " By that rule, then, I have not been frivolous." " tlave you never made plans ? " " Yes, I made one years ago, and I am acting on it to-day." " It must have been a very pleasant one," said Isabel. " It was very simple. It was to be as quiet as possible." " As quiet ? " the girl repeated. " Not to worry not to strive nor struggle. To resign myself. To be content with a little." He uttered these sentences slowly, with little pauses between, and his intelligent eyes were fixed upon Isabel's with the conscious look of a man who has brought himself to confess something. " Do you call that simple ] " Isabel asked, with a gentle laugh. " Yes, because it's negative." " Has your life been negative 1 " " Call it affirmative if you like. Only it has affirmed my indifference. Mind you, not my natural indifference I had none. But my studied, my wilful renunciation." Isabel scarcely understood him ; it seemed a question whether he were joking or not. Why should a man who struck her as having a great fund of reserve suddenly bring himself to be so confidential 1 This was his affair, however, and his confidences were interesting. " I don't see why you should have renounced," she said in a moment. " Because I could do nothing. I had no prospects, I was*