Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/443

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361
POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF THE PICKWICK CLUB
361

THE PICKWICK club'. 361

back one pair of stairs, on one particular morning in July last, when she was dusting Mr. Pickwick's apartment ?"

  • ♦ Yes, my Lord and Jury, I do," replied Mrs. Cluppins.
  • 'Mr. Pickwick's sitting-room was the first-floor front, I beliere?

" Yes, it were. Sir," replied Mrs. Cluppins.

"What were you doing in the backroom, ma'am?" inquired the little Judge.

  • ' My Lord and Jury," said Mrs. Cluppins, with interesting agitation,

" I will not deceive you."

" You had better not, ma'am," said the little Judge.

" I was there," resumed Mrs. Cluppins, " unbeknown to Mrs. BardeJl ; I had been out with a little basket, gentlemen, to buy three pound of red kidney pertaties, which was three pound tuppense ha'penny, when I see Mrs. Bardell's street door on the jar."

" On the what ? exclaimed the little Judge.

" Partly open, my lord," said Sergeant Snubbin.

" She said on the jar," said the little Judge, with a cunning look.

" It's all the same, my lord," said Sergeant Snubbin. The little Judge looked doubtful, and said he'd make a note of it. Mrs. Cluppins then resumed—

" I walked in, gentlemen, just to say good mornin', and went in a permiscuous manner up stairs, and into the back room. Gentlemen, there was the sound of voices in the front room, and — "

  • •' And you listened, I believe, Mrs. Cluppins," said Sergeant Bazfuz.

'* Beggin* your pardon, sir," replied Mrs. Cluppins, in a majestic manner, " I would scorn the haction. The voices was very loud, sir, and forced themselves upon my ear."

" Well, Mrs. Cluppins, you were not listening, but you heard the voices. Was one of tho^e voices Mr. Pickwick's ?

" Yes, it were, sir."

And Mrs. Cluppins, after distinctly stating that Mi*. Pickwick ad- dressed himself to Mrs. Bardell, repeated by slow degrees, and by dint of many questions, the conversation with which our readers are already acquainted.

The Jury looked suspicious, and Mr. Sergeant Buzfuz smiled and sat down. They looked positively awful when Sergeant Snubbin intimated that he should not cross-examine the witness, for Mr. Pickwick wished it to be distinctly stated that it was due to her to say, that her account was in substance correct.

Mrs. Cluppins having once broken the ice, thought it a very favourable opportunity of entering into a short dissertation on her own domestic affairs ; so she straightway proceeded to inform the court that she was the mother of eight children at that present speaking, and that she entertained confident expectations of presenting Mr. Cluppins with a ninth, somewhere about that day six months. At this interesting point, the little judge interposed most irascibly ; and the eftect of the interposition was, that both the worthy lady and Mrs. Sanders were politely taken out of court, under the escort of Mr. Jackson, without further parley.