Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/703

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593
POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF THE PICKWICK CLUB
593

THE PICKWICK CLUB. 593

and Sam encountering every thing with a coolness which nothing could disturb.

Crossing a court-yard which was all noise and bustle ; and passing a couple of porters who seemed dressed to match the red fire-engine which was wheeled away into a corner, they passed into an office where their business was to be transacted, where Pell and Mr. Flasher left them standing for a few moments, while they went up stairs into the Will Office.

" Wot place is this here ? " whispered the mottled-faced gentleman to the elder Mr. Weller.

" Counsel's Office," replied the executor in a whisper, " Wot are them gen' I'men a settin' behind the counters ? asked the hoarse coachman.

" Reduced counsels, I s'pose, replied Mr. Weller. *' Ain't they the reduced counsels, Samivel ? "

'^ Wy, you don't suppose the reduced counsels is alive, do you ? " enquired Sam, with some disdain.

" How should I know ? " retorted Mr. Weller ; " I thought they looked wery like it. Wot are they, then ? " '* Clerks," replied Sam.

" Wot are they all a eatin' ham sangwidges for > " enquired his father.

  • ' 'Cos it's in their dooty, I suppose," replied Sam, '^ it's a part o*

the system ; they're alvays a doin' it here, all day long ! "

Mr. Weller and his friends had scarcely had a moment to reflect upon this singular regulation as connected with the monetary system of the country, when they were rejoined by Pell and Wilkins Flasher, Esquire, who led them to a part of the counter above which was a round black board with a large W " on it.

" Wot's that for. Sir ? " enquired Mr. Weller, directing Pell's atten- tion to the target in question.

" The first letter of the name of the deceased," replied Pell. " I say," said Mr. Weller, turning round to the umpires. " There's somethin' wrong here. We's our letter — this won't do."

The referees at once gave it as their decided opinion that the business could not be legally proceeded with, under the letter W, and in all pro- bability it would have stood over for one day at least, had it not been for the prompt though at first sight undutiful behaviour of Sam, who seizing his father by the skirt of the coat, dragged him to the counter, and pinned him there until he had affixed his signature to a couple of instruments, which from Mr. Weller's habit of printing, was a work of so much labour and time that the officiating clerk peeled and cut three Ripstone pippins while it was performing.

As the elder Mr. Weller insisted on selling out his portion forth- with, they proceeded from the Bank to the gate of the Stock Exchange, to which Wilkins Flasher, Esq., after a short absence, returned with a cheque on Smith, Payne, & Smith, for five hundred and thirty pounds, that being the sum of money to which Mr. Weller at the market price of the day, was entitled, in consideration of the balance of the second Mrs. Weller's funded savings. Sam's two hundred pounds stood