Page:The Strand Magazine (Volume 2).djvu/438

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440
The Strand Magazine.


A pathetic scene.

BALD-HEADED GENTLEMAN IN PIT (TO LADY IN DRESS CIRCLE): "MADAME, I RESPECT YOUR EMOTION, BUT YOU ARE WEEPING ON MY HEAD."


An explanation.

STRANGER (TO SOLEMN INDIVIDUAL): "IS THIS A FUNERAL?"
SOLEMN individual: "no, it's a wedding."
STRANGER: "OH! I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MOURNER."
SOLEMN INDIVIDUAL: "NO, I AM THE SON-IN-LAW OF THE BRIDE'S MOTHER."



Woman's friendship.

CLARA: "I AM GOING TO SEE BELLA SIMPSON. SHALL I TAKE ANY MESSAGE?"
DORA: "WHAT, THAT HORRID GIRL! GIVE HER MY LOVE."


1ST TRAVELLER (ENTERING): "THAT'S MY CORNER."
2ND DITTO: "THERE WAS NOTHING HERE TO KEEP THE SEAT."
1ST DITTO: "That's MY HAT-BOX UP THERE."
2ND DITTO: "THEN SIT UP THERE ON YOUR HAT-BOX."