Page:The Strand Magazine (Volume 2).djvu/657

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THE QUEER SIDE OF THINGS.
661

"I had secretly provided myself with the fat goose and the hog-puddings."

held its Sittings. On the Evening appointed, being Christmas, I did not fail to present myself at the Place; but with a certain mistrust of myself, how I might keep myself from Flight on being presented with such simple Fare; to the which End I had secretly provided myself with the fat Goose and the Hog-puddings, which I had caused to be cunningly divided into such small Portions as I might conveniently dispose in my Pockets, and consume unobserved.


"A gentleman of colour."

I found the Members of the Club to be all Persons of a discreet Age, and of a practical Turn of Mind; among them being several Spinsters. We had no sooner seated ourselves at Table but there entered a Gentleman of Colour, whom I at once recognised for a Moor; for, I would have my Reader to know, for his Instruction, that all Men that are not white are Moors; for, as there are Moors in Central Africa and in the Islands of the Southern Seas, no less are the People Moors that inhabit Japan, the East and West Indies, South America, and Malaya. These all wear Turbans and Scimitars, and are beautified with circular black Eyes and gold Chains. My Friend now whispered me in the Ear that this Gentleman was an East Indian Moor, or, as they are called, Hindoo; and that it was he that would presently be putting them in the Belief that they were feasting sumptuously; all which I by no means understood.

At this time the Moorish, or Hindoo, Gentleman seated himself at the Head of the Table, and made certain curious Wavings of his Hands toward the Company; and, there being presently served a cold Repast of Bread, Potatoes, Porridge, and Water—at which I could not repress a Shudder—they all fell to with a huge Enjoyment, expressing at the same time great Satisfaction at the Delicacy, Variety, and Richness of the Viands, and this with much Smacking of the Lips, and Sucking of the Fingers, as is the Mode in all good Society; especially among the Tartars, who are the Moors inhabiting some Parts of the Continent of Asia.


"I do pray you make but a trial of this venison pasty."

"I do pray you make but a Trial of this Venison Pasty," says a Gentleman, passing a dry Crust to the good Lady that sat by him; "for I vow it is of all Delicacies the most to be praised!"

"It hath indeed a very excellent palatable Flavour," cries she in an Ecstasy, "and bespeaks a Cook of no small Parts in his Calling." "This Claret is of a notable rare Vintage!" cries a Third; and in such Wise the Rest of them; insomuch that I must needs stuff my Handkerchief in my Mouth to keep myself from laughing lustily. Then the whole Company were for pressing these Delicacies upon me, till I