I propose that the accounts be laid before the finance committee. . . ."
"Is there any opposition?. . ."
"The proposal is carried."
"Have I heard aright?" asked Professor Obnubile. "What? you an industrial people and engaged in all these wars!"
"Certainly," answered the interpreter, "these are industrial wars. Peoples who have neither commerce nor industry are not obliged to make war, but a business people is forced to adopt a policy of conquest. The number of wars necessarily increases with our productive capacity. As soon as one of our industries fails to find a market for its products a war is necessary to open new outlets. It is in this way we have had a coal war, a copper war, and a cotton war. In Third-Zealand we have killed two-thirds of the inhabitants in order to compel the remainder to buy our umbrellas and braces."
At that moment a fat man who was sitting in the middle of the assembly ascended the tribune.
"I claim," said he, "a war against the Emerald Republic, which insolently contends with our pigs for the hegemony of hams and sauces in all the markets of the universe."
"Who is that legislator?" asked Doctor Obnubile.
"He is a pig merchant."
"Is there any opposition?" said the President. "I put the proposition to the vote."
The war against the Emerald Republic was voted with uplifted hands by a very large majority.
"What?" said Obnubile to the interpreter; "you have voted a war with that rapidity and that indifference!"
