Page:The pastor in his closet.djvu/38

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24
MONDAY.

from love of self, from love of men’s opinions, from pride, from love of advancement, from cowardice in rebuking sinners, or from harshness in rebuke.

I know that I oftentimes yield to sloth; I am often indolent, a waster of time, an ill husbandman of time; I abide at home when I should be labouring among my people; I linger and hesitate to go forth, or I leave off too soon and do my work but partially, or I shrink from those who most need exhortation, from the most sinful and hardened of my people; I please myself with the conversation of the devout; I choose rather to sit with the righteous, than to go among sinners; I have often distaste for my toils; I want heart for them and patience; I often go to them unwillingly and end gladly; or when I have done little I think I have done enough. Indolence doth much possess me, and backwardness; I had rather read holy books than work holy works; I had rather sit meditating upon holy things than perform holy labours. I am often seeking excuses for easing my neck from the yoke.

And yet whensoever I have devoted myself to my flock and have spared not myself, I have returned home with a recompense in my heart, with a gift in my bosom, a treasure of inward satis-