20 meeting the laird jist coming hame frae a hunting party, he says-“This is a fine day, laird.” “A fine day, Habbie," quo' the laird; “Hoo's a' wi' ye ? are ye no coming up to play us a spring on the pipes the nicht?" "It wadna look very weel, laird, for me to be playing on the pipes at your house, and my ain wife lying a corpse at hame." "What! is Janet deid? quo' the laird. " Atweel is she," quo' Habbie, " And I'm sure it couldna ha'e happened at a waur time, for there's neither meat nor siller in the house. and hoo to get her decently aneath the yird, I'm sure I dinna ken." “Dinna vex yoursel about that," quo' the laird, gi'en him some money; "There's a trifle for you." "Habbie thanked the laird for his kindness, bade him guid day, and can hame geyan weel pleased wi' what he had gotten, and Bends Janet oot wi' the bottle to get mair whisky to carry on the spree. In the meantime, hame gangs the laird, whaur the first thing that he heard was, that Habbie Simpson was deid. “Na, na," quo' he, " It's no Habbie, it's only Janet." "It's Habbie, quo' the lady; "Wasna Janet here this morning her- sel and tell’t me? and didna she get awa' some speerits and biscuits, as she said there was nothing in the house?” “And didna I meet Habbie just as I was coming hame, when he tell’t me that Janet was deid. But I see hoo it is—they are at their auld tricks again. But come, we'll awa' to Habbie's, and see what they're about." In the meantime, Habbie and Janet are fuddlin' in fine style, and lauchin' heartily at the way ta'en to raise the wind, when Janet cries --"Guid preserve us, Habbie, what's to be dune noo! I declare if that's no the laird and the leddy, and they're coming straucht here!" "I dinna ken, quo' Habbie, “what to do unless we are baith deid.” Sae in the bed they gaed, and they were nae sooner doon, than the laird and lady cam in, and seeing Habbie and Janet in bed, he says-"Waes me! isna that awful to see ? The man and wife baith deid! But I'd gi'e five shillings this moment to ken which o' the twa dee't first." The words were nao
