22 ish; and I daurgay I micht bae remained foolish tae this very day had it no been for the kind, the sooth- ing, the winning gaet o' my ain wife Jennet, wha addressed me in the following good-natured strain:- Robin, quo she, Robin, mony an advice I hae gien ye, man, but your sair head and your toom pouch this morning shows plainly that I hae laboured in vain! Noo, I wad gie ye an advice, if ye wad but tak it man--it's done thousands guid that hae waded a heap deeper in the ditch than ever ye did. My simple request is this, Robin, that ye'll summon up a' your resolution, and join the Teetotalers! A weel, fock, I was at the time labouring under an awfu' re- morse o' conscience-& state o' mind weel named the horrors:--when Jennet's words fell on my lugs, and re-echoed the qualms o' the faithfu' monitor within. I saidna muckle at the time, but I assure yo I thocht hard; and I there and then determined, that as soon as the shaking o' my hand wad permit me, to scart down my name, down it wad gang, and then if it should rain whisky, I wad put up my umbrella to keep it aft' me! Weel, I gaed awa about it at e'en, and found out the secretary o' the society, and I scarted down my name in round write, coorse enough to be seen on baith sides, and hurried hame to tell the wife, Jennet; and on hearing the news, she maist lap back height wi' joy; and noo the Saturday nichts are the happy reverse o' what they were in former days, for instead o'gaun hame the waur o' the base liquor, whisky, I can gang bame wi' my siller jingling in my pouch, wi' my waft in the tae hand, and a sheep's head in the tither, and the trotters sticking oot o' every coat and waistcoat pouch like young kangaroos, and my head stuffed fu' o' temperance news, and my bonnet wi' as mony tracts on the same subject, as, if spread out, wad mak'a guid Reformer's flag. Time wad fail me fock, to tell ye a'the benefits o' the new system; but I was just anxious to appear amang ye for the double purpose o' redeeming my character, and recommending that cause to ithers that has been sic a wonderful blessing to mysel'