Sir Neil and Glengyle, the Highland Chieftains: a Tragical Ballad/The Drunken Exciseman

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For other versions of this work, see The Drunken Exciseman.

THE DRUNKEN EXCISEMAN.

I know that young folks like to hear a new song,
Of something that's funny and not very long.
It is of an Exciseman the truth I will tell,
Who thought that one night he was going to hell.
Fal de lal, &c.

One night he went out to look for his prey.
He did meet with some smugglers, as I heard them say,
In tasting the liquors they were going to sell.
The Exciseman got drunk, the truth I will tell.

He got so intoxicated he fell to the ground.
And like a fat sow was forced to lie down,
Just nigh to a coal pit the Exciseman did lie.
When four or five colliers by chance did come by.

They shouldered him up and hoised him away,
Like a pedler’s pack, without any delay;
Into the bucket they handed him down,
This jolly Exciseman they got under ground.

The Exciseman awakened with terrible fear,
Upstarted a collier, says, what brought you here?
Indeed Mr. Devil, I don’t very well know,
But I think I am come to the regions below.

Says the collier, what was you in the world above,
I was an Exciseman and few did me love:
Indeed Mr. Devil the truth I will tell,
Since I have got here, I’ll be what you will.

Since you’re an Exciseman, here you must remain,
You will never get out of this dark cell again;
The gates they are fast, and bind you secure,
All this you must suffer for robbing the poor.

Indeed Mr. Devil if you’ll pity me,
No more will I rob the poor you shall see;
If you will look over, as you’ve done before,
I never will rob the poor any more.

Come give me your money, which now I demand,
Before you can get to the Christian land,
O yes, Mr. Devil, the Exciseman did say,
I wish to get back, for to see light of day.