The History of the Adventures of Joseph Andrews and his Friend, Mr. Abraham Abrams/Book II, Chapter VIII
CHAPTER VIII.
_A notable dissertation by Mr Abraham Adams; wherein that gentleman
appears in a political light._
"I do assure you, sir" (says he, taking the gentleman by the hand), "I
am heartily glad to meet with a man of your kidney; for, though I am a
poor parson, I will be bold to say I am an honest man, and would not do
an ill thing to be made a bishop; nay, though it hath not fallen in my
way to offer so noble a sacrifice, I have not been without opportunities
of suffering for the sake of my conscience, I thank Heaven for them; for
I have had relations, though I say it, who made some figure in the
world; particularly a nephew, who was a shopkeeper and an alderman of a
corporation. He was a good lad, and was under my care when a boy; and I
believe would do what I bade him to his dying day. Indeed, it looks like
extreme vanity in me to affect being a man of such consequence as to
have so great an interest in an alderman; but others have thought so
too, as manifestly appeared by the rector, whose curate I formerly was,
sending for me on the approach of an election, and telling me, if I
expected to continue in his cure, that I must bring my nephew to vote
for one Colonel Courtly, a gentleman whom I had never heard tidings of
till that instant. I told the rector I had no power over my nephew's
vote (God forgive me for such prevarication!); that I supposed he would
give it according to his conscience; that I would by no means endeavour
to influence him to give it otherwise. He told me it was in vain to
equivocate; that he knew I had already spoke to him in favour of esquire
Fickle, my neighbour; and, indeed, it was true I had; for it was at a
season when the church was in danger, and when all good men expected
they knew not what would happen to us all. I then answered boldly, if he
thought I had given my promise, he affronted me in proposing any breach
of it. Not to be too prolix; I persevered, and so did my nephew, in the
esquire's interest, who was chose chiefly through his means; and so I
lost my curacy, Well, sir, but do you think the esquire ever mentioned a
word of the church? _Ne verbum quidem, ut ita dicam_: within two years
he got a place, and hath ever since lived in London; where I have been
informed (but God forbid I should believe that,) that he never so much
as goeth to church. I remained, sir, a considerable time without any
cure, and lived a full month on one funeral sermon, which I preached on
the indisposition of a clergyman; but this by the bye. At last, when Mr
Fickle got his place, Colonel Courtly stood again; and who should make
interest for him but Mr Fickle himself! that very identical Mr Fickle,
who had formerly told me the colonel was an enemy to both the church and
state, had the confidence to sollicit my nephew for him; and the colonel
himself offered me to make me chaplain to his regiment, which I refused
in favour of Sir Oliver Hearty, who told us he would sacrifice
everything to his country; and I believe he would, except his hunting,
which he stuck so close to, that in five years together he went but
twice up to parliament; and one of those times, I have been told, never
was within sight of the House. However, he was a worthy man, and the
best friend I ever had; for, by his interest with a bishop, he got me
replaced into my curacy, and gave me eight pounds out of his own pocket
to buy me a gown and cassock, and furnish my house. He had our interest
while he lived, which was not many years. On his death I had fresh
applications made to me; for all the world knew the interest I had with
my good nephew, who now was a leading man in the corporation; and Sir
Thomas Booby, buying the estate which had been Sir Oliver's, proposed
himself a candidate. He was then a young gentleman just come from his
travels; and it did me good to hear him discourse on affairs which, for
my part, I knew nothing of. If I had been master of a thousand votes he
should have had them all. I engaged my nephew in his interest, and he
was elected; and a very fine parliament-man he was. They tell me he made
speeches of an hour long, and, I have been told, very fine ones; but he
could never persuade the parliament to be of his opinion. _Non omnia
possumus omnes_. He promised me a living, poor man! and I believe I
should have had it, but an accident happened, which was, that my lady
had promised it before, unknown to him. This, indeed, I never heard till
afterwards; for my nephew, who died about a month before the incumbent,
always told me I might be assured of it. Since that time, Sir Thomas,
poor man, had always so much business, that he never could find leisure
to see me. I believe it was partly my lady's fault too, who did not
think my dress good enough for the gentry at her table. However, I must
do him the justice to say he never was ungrateful; and I have always
found his kitchen, and his cellar too, open to me: many a time, after
service on a Sunday--for I preach at four churches--have I recruited my
spirits with a glass of his ale. Since my nephew's death, the
corporation is in other hands; and I am not a man of that consequence I
was formerly. I have now no longer any talents to lay out in the service
of my country; and to whom nothing is given, of him can nothing be
required. However, on all proper seasons, such as the approach of an
election, I throw a suitable dash or two into my sermons; which I have
the pleasure to hear is not disagreeable to Sir Thomas and the other
honest gentlemen my neighbours, who have all promised me these five
years to procure an ordination for a son of mine, who is now near
thirty, hath an infinite stock of learning, and is, I thank Heaven, of
an unexceptionable life; though, as he was never at an university, the
bishop refuses to ordain him. Too much care cannot indeed be taken in
admitting any to the sacred office; though I hope he will never act so
as to be a disgrace to any order, but will serve his God and his country
to the utmost of his power, as I have endeavoured to do before him; nay,
and will lay down his life whenever called to that purpose. I am sure I
have educated him in those principles; so that I have acquitted my duty,
and shall have nothing to answer for on that account. But I do not
distrust him, for he is a good boy; and if Providence should throw it in
his way to be of as much consequence in a public light as his father
once was, I can answer for him he will use his talents as honestly as I
have done."