Translation:The Mysterious Individual/II

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1201601Translation:The Mysterious Individual — SECTION IIWikisourceLudwig Tieck


They had barely covered half a mile from the city when the carriage collided with a tree trunk and overturned, pitching the travellers into the deep snow.

This is a tiresome business, old Christoph said petulantly. Yesterday this last mile also cost me the most hassle and the greatest effort. A cart with grain was travelling to the city, which was just about tolerable, then the opportunity arose of continuing my journey in the mail-coach, but this last mile here in the mountains!

Kronenberg tried to comfort him. When they had dusted themselves down and climbed back into the carriage, glad that the accident had had no worse consequences, the young man was obliged to indulge the old man, who proceeded to compensate himself for his suffering by prattling away. He gave an extensive account of the state of the entire household of the family that Kronenberg was to see that very evening; he lost himself in stories and anecdotes, and revealed many absurdities that characterized the old lord and did not show his son, Ferdinand's friend, in the best light.

Nothing but hardship and drudgery, he finally added as an appendix to his report. And if in the end they no longer know which way to turn, old Christoph is kind enough to provide advice, or to hike for miles just to spare the dear horses and not annoy the fancy coachman; because, believe you me, Sir, out of a thousand gentlemen scarcely half know how to manage their servants: even the best domestic servant slips out of harness if he is not instructed in a sensible manner: and bit by bit he loses his talents and also his good qualities. Granted a man cannot but achieve whatever he wants if he has but the motivation; without that nothing is certain. If I were a young lieutenant, I would disconcert the eldest and most experienced Grenadier, and by constantly criticizing and reprimanding him for no reason whatever I would turn him into a muddled, disorganized and poor soldier in four weeks. Sometimes, when I am walking through the main hall, I hear the young master arguing about regents and statesmen; he says there is nothing extraordinary about any of them because they do not understand the art of government. I don't know if he's right, but he ought to begin with himself; because he has ruined all the servants in the castle through his absentmindedness, and later, when he has caused mistakes, by uncalled-for severity; bit by bit he makes them all deceitful; several have already become scoundrels, and they are even infecting the others now. For, as I said, without proper order, strictness and punctuality, there can be absolutely no common sense in the world.

You have always been too strict and moral, you old fogy, Kronenberg replied from under his coat.

Why old fogy? continued Christoph. You should only call someone an old fogy if no one can figure him out. I don't ask for anything special or unusual from my employer, or from anyone who crosses my path, no love or generous gifts, no rare virtues or brilliant miracles of wisdom, but simply the most ordinary of dispositions, no more than what the dog demands of its master if it is to remain a useful animal. And this thing, precisely because it is so ordinary, is too insignificant to all these modern excessively prudent gentlemen, they do not even notice it, there is not a pennyworth of praise in it; and so it is disappearing completely from the world, and for this very reason there will soon be as few servants as there are gentlemen on the Earth; there will just be one enormous muddle, a shouting match, a racket behind which lies nothing, and then in the end they will still say, the common man is no good.

So you are dissatisfied with the whole world? interjected Kronenberg.

I am only acquainted with the world, the old man grumbled on, as far as the end of my nose. I don't understand it. How can a man not know the people he deals with every day? I know my masters and everything related to their house. But our masters, our clever young lord at any rate, do not know us their servants, whatever appears good to us they consider worthless. If someone is now and again praised in some measure when a fine gentleman is looking for his walking-stick, or if someone is reprimanded for things he did correctly and with the best of intentions, if judges always find in favour of wicked people, if every incitement to hatred and every stupid prattle of the upper classes is cheerfully adopted, then soon a nest of bad servants will be hatched. I just think that any gentleman who cannot keep his household in order should keep his trap shut and not be so quick to rebuke his superiors.

You don't understand, the young man said. The cold and the bad weather, and especially your long march yesterday, have upset you.

And rightly too, said Christoph. Yesterday you behaved as if you did not know me, and yet it was only by a hair's breadth that you saw me at all last night.

How so?

I finally saw the confounded fortress in front of me, continued Christoph, and I was trudging around the city in order to reach your inn. It was already quite dark. I was slipping and sliding all over the place; I was hungry, thirsty, frozen. I was now close to the Golden Swan; I could already see its lights. Suddenly four or five chaps emerge from around the corner, apprehend me and cry: At last! We've been watching out for you for ages! I fight back, pushing and punching, and when I finally manage to unbutton my thick cap, because I wasn't able to speak with it on, I cried out with all my might: What do you want, you scoundrels, you footpads? with some other honorary titles that burst out in my anger. Then they released me and disappeared around the corner, muttering: No, it's not him, let him go! This man understands our fine German mother tongue perfectly. So I don't know what clown they must have mistaken me for; but, still, you can see from this how people no longer trust one another, how it is no longer safe to walk the streets, how the muddle is continually spreading, and no matter where I happen to go, everything look completely different from what it was twenty or thirty years ago.

The arduous stage of their journey was over sooner than they had expected thanks to these and similar discussions. Now the plain spread out before them once again and the travellers reached the next stop without further mishap. The fresh carriage was already drawn up in front of the inn in this small town. The dapper coachman greeted the young gentleman. Kronenberg took a seat at the dining table in the inn, as it was midday, and after a friendly discussion, saw that old Christoph as well as the coachmen were given a good meal and a bottle of wine. The old man smiled to himself, as though he was thinking: This gentleman wants to behave as if he knew how to deal with us domestics.

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