User:ShakespeareFan00/Filk

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Come forth O scribes[edit]

Come forth O scribes of Scotland!,
Come forth such worthy band!
Come forth with such a' plenty,
The heratige of a land.

Though each effort individual
seem not such a greatertask
in present purpose so combined
they add up very fast.

Come forth O scribes of Scotland!, &c.

First, from such pages that are old,
Transcript what therein is hold;
Mark word each all as be it writ,
so page it is complete.

Come forth O scribes of Scotland!, &c.

Now second come others, checking o'er the work
So that of mistakes made, ne'er be any talk
Each line be so just corrected,
so for time be stood.

Come forth O scribes of Scotland!, &c.

Thirdly, such a' pages, now be recombined
and thus as one work presented fully lined.
Then it is listed, with doubts a' fled
and so by public read.

Come forth O scribes of Scotland!, &c.

Come not close, my lady[edit]

Come not close, me my lady,
come not close to me,
For brighter a' days are a wantin,
when you could e'er embrace to me.

Foul mist is in the airing,
and fever within it's air
Shutter yoursel' my lady,
For never upon you should this be.

Come not close, &c.

Within your own dwellin'
Keep yoursel' so well secure.
Protect your health my lady,
and lives of your family.

Come not close, &c.

Guard well now your father,
for aged he and mother be;
For fate may overcome them;
if partaketh foul mist do thee.

Come not close, &c.

Hold firm shutter'd my lady,
We a' shall see sun again,
But until e'er that embracen,
Come not close to me.

The Bogle o' the cards..=[edit]

Now I write so you may ken
And to others this missive sen'
In Edinburgh a house of books
Through which the learned looks
And amongst the books an index card'd there
of that held in that houses care.
And amongst the books and card lurk'd there
A bogle O' the cards.

It was in some tewntieh year now bare,
To with public, the books decided share,
The house in keeping with it's goal
Posted up many stories tol'
And mongst tales unatural given.
Of w'ere the came or be written.
But sensing now a chance came forth
A bogle O' the cards

The bogle knew well the prank to play
to make the cards reading astray
Bogle'd moved from card to card
And jumped the details twixt em hard.
And so one card for a book thus seen
altered by, for 'nother work umpteen
A bogle O' the cards.

Oh what distress! this could cause
And unwary scholar to the tawse.
But this scribe of said bogle ken
moved cards back ere they should have been
And knowing still wrote this account
So other knowing that there be no more about
A bogle O' the cards.


Who's Next 'Updated' (with Apologies to Tom Leher) =[edit]

First we got the bomb and that was good,
'Cause we love peace and motherhood.
Then Russia got the bomb, but that's O.K.,
'Cause the balance of power's maintained that way!
Who's next?

France got the bomb, but don't you grieve,
'Cause they're on our side (I believe)
[1]Great Britannia, ruled across the waves,
But an independent deterrent is what she saves!
Who's next?

China got the bomb, a historical fact,
but where on earth might be attacked?
Isr-ael may well have had a go
[2]They don't tell so we don't know!
Who's next?

India was a bomb no one foretold
but "for peace" it was very bold.
It's neighbours Pakistan, built a twin
In case a South-Asian conflict could begin.
Who's next?

Iran will have a device soon any day
Or so the Hawks presume to say
North Korea, tests with an angry fit,
but it certainly had the touch-paper lit.
Who's Next?

Brazil maybe next to go?
Cause who knows the mind of Bolsonaro?.
We'll try to stay serene and calm
When Alabama gets the bomb!
Who's next, who's next, who's next?
Who's next?


"Rumors"[edit]

VERSE:
I follow my feeds close-ly
And people follow me?
We're just as close
As we can be
And just because
We pasionately care
Whatever we hear
We share!

CHORUSES:
I heard it from Angus
He heard it from Jim

We all agree it must have been Louis who re-tweeted it to him
claims he heard it from Harry, who was following Marie
And everybody "knows" that Marie
doesn't post conspiracy

Giles heard it from Daphne
She heard it from Joan
Who picked it up on some obscure forum, with a varied tone,
Pierre messaged it to Sheila, who must have posted there
He got it from Francois and Jacques, aha! ---
Lucky Pierre!

Max heard it from Edith
A constant "content" spring
She got it from her Father, who tells her everything
She then gave it to Daniel, whose channel has it now
Our dentist even heard it, and we're still ----
Wondering how!

But I heard it from Agnes
Or maybe it was Sue
Or Millie or Billie or Gillie or Willie, it doesn't matter where
It might have been on Facebook,Reddit, 4chan does it matter if it's not true?
And if you will be my "friend", then I might
Mind you, I said "might"
{Dramatic pause, looks around nervously, as if watching for people..)
Disclose it all to you!

  1. cf. lyrics from Rule Brittania
  2. Israel has consistently maintained a policy of nuclear ambiguity