And mine—(about to shake hands—a postman's knock heard at the street door.)
Cox.
Halloa! Postman again!
Box.
Postman yesterday—postman to-day—
EnterBouncer, d. l. c.
Boun.
Another letter, Colonel Cox—twopence more!
Cox.
I forgive you again! (taking letter.) Another trifle from Margate. (Opens letter—starts.) Goodness gracious!
Box.
(snatching letter—starts.) Gracious goodness!
Cox
(snatching letter again—reads.) "Happy to inform you, false alarm."
Box
(overlooking). "Sudden squall—boat upset—Mrs. Wiggins, your intended"—
Cox.
"Picked up by steamboat"—
Box
"Carried into Boulogne"—
Cox.
"Returned here this morning"—
Box.
"Will start by early train to-morrow"—
Cox.
"And be with you at ten o'clock exact."
[Both simultaneously pull out their watches.
Box.
Cox, I congratulate you—
Cox
Box, I give you joy!
Box.
I'm sorry that most important business at the Colonial Office will prevent my witnessing the truly happy meeting between you and your intended. Good morning.
[Going.
Cox.
(stopping him). It's obviously for me to retire. Not for worlds would I disturb the rapturous meeting between you and your intended. Good morning!
Box.
You'll excuse me, sir—but our last arrangement was that she was your intended.
Cox.
No, yours!
Box.
Yours!
Together.
Yours!
[Ten o'clock strikes—noise of an omnibus.
Box.
Ha! What's that! A cab's drawn up at the door! (Running to window.) No—it's a twopenny omnibus!
Cox.
(leaning over Box's shoulder). A lady's got out—
Box.
There's no mistaking that majestic person—it's Penelope Ann!
Cox.
Your intended!
Box.
Yours!
Cox.
Yours!
[Both run to door, l. c., and eagerly listen.
Box.
Hark—she's coming up stairs.
Cox.
Shut the door!
[They slam the door and both lean against it with their backs.
Boun.
(without, and knocking). Colonel!
Cox
(shouting). I've just stepped out!
Box.
So have I!
Boun.
(without). Mr. Cox! (pushing at the door—Cox and Box redouble their efforts to keep the door shut.) Open the door! It's only me—Sergeant Bouncer.
Cox.
Only you? Then where's the lady?
Boun.
Gone!
Cox.
Upon your honor?
Box.
As a Militiaman?
Boun.
Yes; and she's left a note for Brigadier Cox.
Cox.
Give it to me.
Boun.
Then open the door!
Cox
Put it under! (A letter is put under the door, Cox picks up the letter and opens it.) Goodness gracious!
Box
(snatching letter). Gracious goodness! (Coxsnatches the letter, and runs forward, followed by Box.)
Cox
(reading). "Dear Mr. Cox—Pardon my candor"—
Box
looking over, and reading). "But being convinced that our feelings, like our ages, do not reciprocate"—
Cox.
"I hasten to apprize you of my immediate union"—
Box.
"With Mr. Knox."
Cox.
Huzza!
Box.
Three cheers for Knox. Ha, ha, ha! (Tosses the letter in the air, and begins dancing. Cox does the same.)
Boun.
(putting his head in at door). The little second floor back room is quite ready!
Cox.
I don't want it.
Box.
No more do I!
Cox.
What shall part us?
Box.
What shall tear us asunder?
Cox.
Box.
Box.
Cox. (About to embrace—Box stops, seizes Cox's hand, and looks eagerly in his face.) You'll excuse the apparent insanity of the remark, but the more I gaze on your features, the more I'm convinced that you're my long-lost brother.
Cox.
The very observation I was going to make to you!
Box.
Ah—tell me—in mercy tell me—have you such a thing as a strawberry mark on your left arm?
Cox.
No!
Box.
Then it is he!
[They rush into each other's arms.
Cox.
Of course we stop where we are?
Box.
Of course.
Cox.
For, between you and me, I'm rather partial to this house.
Box
So am I—I begin to feel quite at home in it.
Cox.
Everything so clean and comfortable.
Box.
And I'm sure the master of it, from what I have seen of him, is very anxious to please.
