Page:Screenland October 1923.djvu/45

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SCREENLAND
45
Any one who desires to behave properly in pictures should heed these words of advice. The screen has established its own code of morals and manners, and to succeed in its best society certain rules and regulations must be observed.


Rule regarding love: When kissed the second time she should give an ecstatic back kick, clutching her sweetheart by his coat lapels.
Rule regarding love: When kissed the second time she should give an ecstatic back kick, clutching her sweetheart by his coat lapels.

Rule regarding love: When kissed the second time she should give an ecstatic back kick, clutching her sweetheart by his coat lapels.


Perfect Behavior at Orgies

Strictly speaking, this is impossible. By perfect we mean, of course, correct. Flowers will be scattered and paper caps distributed. Sometimes a swimming pool is provided for the guests. Care should be taken not to drink champagne from a slipper. Up-to-date orgies have a reigning beauty appear from a floral centerpiece and dance. The male guests should then toss jewels at her. An air of impressive hilarity must be obtained at any cost. To gain this effect it is generally necessary for all guests to fall gracefully into reclining attitudes. Otherwise your audiences might not guess that the orgy has been a huge success.


Hints for Big Business Men

Practice is required to give just the right touch to the examination of the ticker tape, the alighting from your motor, the chewing of cigars, and presiding at directors' meetings. Perhaps even more difficult is the scene at your desk when you sit there with bowed head groaning, "My God, I'm ruined." The pace up and down the office is a good thing to remember. It should be done slowly, one hand behind the back, the other toying with pince-nez. The pince-nez is also employed to advantage in a conference—tapping the chin with it has been known to change the entire course of events in The Street. Don't worry about your home life. You can always be detained at the office.


Private Lives of Actresses, Dancers, etc.

A luxurious apartment is absolutely essential, one with iron-grilled gates instead of doors preferred. No man should be permitted to cross the threshold. Don a negligee and begin returning the gifts admirers have sent you. You may keep the flowers, but pearls, bracelets, and diamond pendants must be returned. This will take up all your time outside of the theatre.


How to Behave at Tea

It is quite all right for you, little girl, to go to tea in his apartment. Your poke bonnet will protect you. After the Japanese valet has been dismissed, your host will try to hold your hand. Snatch it away and run to the door. When you find it is locked, try to assume surprise. When a knock is heard, run into the next room. In a moment you will hear a female relative's voice—it may be your step-mother, or your older sister, demanding to know where you are. In a minute she will join you—your father, fiance, or brother has arrived. Clutch her hands until she leaves you to confront the men. As soon as the hub-bub dies, slip out quietly. Remember, a real lady always avoids scenes.


The Debutante

Should be surrounded by a mob of young men all trying to claim her attention. She should laughingly shake her head at them and run off to another group of young men. Of late she has extended her activities somewhat—she lived her own life in Greenwich Village, smoked, went for rides in airplanes. But it is the earnest hope of all lovers of good form that she will soon return to the ballroom and be her sweet, simple natural self again.


Procedure at Country Places

Only those with appropriate wardrobes may aspire to social success in the country. Natty little sports costumes of velvet or georgette, trimmed with fur, for the girls;

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