98 THE DARK DAY.
productions of the ancients and the moderns were familiar to me, in their original, and in translation; but they are cold and unmoving, when compared to his funeral prayer. It was only such an exercise that could call back my shattered and wandering thoughts, and I felt myself reviving to a full sense of my misery. *
“Some members of the family were talking near my door, of me, of my feelings, my depths of misery. One proposed that I should be called to take a last look the thought was madness. I fastened my door and threw myself upon a bed -A last look! I had taken it; the filmy eye, the blanched cheek, the trembling lip, over which breathed blessings to men and praise to God, were stamped upon my senses, in characters of fire searing my brain, and deadening all outward faculties.
“At night, it was dark and comfortless to the world, I left the house and pursued my way to the burying ground. I have thought since of that night; but I cannot recollect a single object, between the dwelling house and the house of God for though the distance is nearly a mile— one thought absorbed me I had but one sensation one mode of receiving feeling, and that was directed to a single object.
“I found the grave with ease: it was near the only tomb in the yard, and remained unsodded. I stretched myself upon the humid loam, and lay there till I was chilled, and numbed almost to insensibility; Oh! how I hoped that life was departing. Every respiration seemed to exhaust, and I felt the coldness of the new turned earth, creeping around my heart; and I thought when I awoke from that grave, it would be with her, who was far below me, silent and insensible to my woes.
“Would you believe it? with the gray light of morning, came a sense of shame; yet not for myself; there was a fear upon me, that my weakness might do discredit to the name of Miriam. That thought alone could animate me; I dragged myself from the spot, and gained my chamber before the sun had risen.
“When next I mingled with the family, I observed something singular in their manners towards me. The younger branches suspended their little amusements as I approached; the domestics gazed upon me, my parents forbore the least contradiction, and my mother would scarcely address me without tears; but one thing
The writer feels that a better occasion might have been chosen to refer to a distinguishing excellence in the professional duties of a living clergyman, than a single paragraph of a professedly fictitious story. But this story was written as one of a series, illustrative of the scenery and character of a particular section of country, and the author can never recal that scenery without connecting with its beauties the higher ornaments of the cultivated mind, the meek enduring spirit, the eminent Christian virtues, and the exceeding modesty of the clergyman to whom reference is made. One who owes to the precepts and example of that good man much of his capacity to enjoy the pleasures, and more of his abilities to endure the pains of life, adds to his feeble testimony of deep respect, his ardent wishes, that his evening of life may be as tranquil and happy, as its day has been eminently useful.
most of all I noticed, it would have paid me for every kind of ill treatment: -Not one mentioned the name of Miriam. Every object likely tc bring her suddenly to mind was removed but so wayward is the will, that even the absence of these objects would press upon me a course of reflections it was intended to prevent.
“The peculiarity in the conduct of the family towards me, turned my reflections towards myself was it possible that my conduct indicated any thing more than grief? -than bitter disappointment? Could those about me suspect me of hallucination? It was certain that their mode of treatment was unusual but so was my grief and its cause. I determined while I noticed the change in their conduct, to set a guard over my own.
“One night, while sitting at my window, the peculiar placidity of the bay, induced me to leave the house: -I wandered along the shore till I approached the broken wharf in our rear, when I felt an inclination to visit the beach alone; to sit upon the projecting cliff, and think of her whose safety had consecrated the spot. I took a small boat, and a light westerly breeze soon wafted me there.
“I sat down upon the beach; I remember distinctly; it was not then dawn; the light of the stars was visible in the slight surf which rolled towards my feet; daylight at length appeared: I scarcely thought that any objects of nature could call my mind from that single subject of contemplation to which I dedicated the time, and for which I approached that place; but the broad streak of light that shot up beyond the heights of Monumet, was certainly peculiarthe horizon was not gradually illumined, nor did the light appear to extend beyond its corrusca tions.
“The sun rose, and the world was gay; I returned to my contemplations. I was at length aroused by the approach of, the tide; on looking around, I found it impossible to distinguish objects at a short distance, with any distinctness; there was not a cloud in the horizon, and yet the light of the day was not equal to the faintest gleams of twilight; objects at hand presented a curious hue, and the white shells that lined the margin of the beach, appeared now of a saffron colour.
“The shore birds had retired as at the approach of night. Strange feelings came over me; thoughts unutterable; there was an unknown sensation on me; my mind occasionally wandered, and I found an effort necessary to keep my thoughts in regular train. It was not night, I thought, or the stars would appear; yet the sun, the great source of day was absent — but the lamps of the Gurnet light house were not lighted, and my own sensations were not those of a man who has long fasted.
“After many hours, whose progress I had no means of measuring, excepting by the tide, I determined to return; without knowing whether I departed by night or by day. I had scarcely proceeded a mile when night indeed came
