Page:English Caricaturists and Graphic Humourists of the nineteenth century.djvu/301

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" THE GREAT DOCTOR LONG."

account) some anatomical drawings for a medical London school, picked up a slight and imperfect knowledge of anatomy. This stimulated him to further superficial research; and after a few months' probation, his confidence enabled him to pretend that he possessed a cure for every disease under the sun—more especially consumption.[1]

The origin and pretensions of this learned practitioner are thus referred to in one of the rhymes of the day:—

"You may talk of your Celsus, Machaons, and Galens,
Physicians who cured all incurable ailings,
But ne'er yet was doctor applauded in song
Like that erudite Phœnix, the great Doctor Long.

Such astonishing cures he performs, I assure ye,
Some think him a god—all a lusus naturæ:
The whole animal system, no matter how wrong,
Is set right in a moment by great Doctor Long.

Through all regions his vast reputation has flown,
Through the torrid, the frigid, and temperate zone;
The wretch, just expiring, springs healthy and strong
From his bed at one touch of the great Doctor Long.

His skill to experience, what potentates ran —
The Pope, the Grand Llama, the King of Japan!
The great Chinese autocrat, mighty Fon Whong,
Was cured of the ' doldrums ' by famed Doctor Long!

In each serious case he considers as well as
Doctor Horace, 'naturam cum furcâ expellas';
'Dame Nature' (i.e.) 'you must poke with a prong.'
Pretty poking she gets from the great Doctor Long.

He cures folks à merveille, the French people cry;
The Greeks all pronounce him θειοτατον τι.
Dutch and Germans adore him; the Irish among,
'To be sure he's the dandy!' Go bragh, Doctor Long!


  1. His theory, as stated in a book which he published, was this: that as all men are born in moral sin, so they have about them a physical depravity in the form of an acrid humour, which, flying about the system, at length finds vent in diseases which afflict or terminate existence. He professed by the means afterwards explained to bring this acrid humour to the surface, and having thus expelled the cause of disease, to put an end to every bodily ailment.