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52
The Philosophy of Beards.

In the same reign. John de Morillers was also objected to by the Chapter of Orleans; but the cunning fellow produced a letter from the king stating, that the statutes must be dispensed with in his case, as his majesty intended to employ him in countries where he could not appear without a Beard.

At the court of the rival of Francis, Charles the 5th, who had himself a right royal covering to his chin, lived John Mayo, his painter, a very tall man, but with a Beard so long, that he could stand upon it; and in which he took much pride, suspending it by ribbons to his button-hole. Sometimes this mass of hair, by command of the Emperor, was unfastened at table, and doors and windows being thrown open, the imperial mind took intense delight in seeing it blown into the faces of his grimacing courtiers. Another noted German Beard was that of a merchant of Braunau in Bavaria, which was so long, that it would have draggled on the ground, had it not been incased by its proud owner in a beautiful velvet bag.[1]

  1. Southey in "The Doctor" mentions the Beard of Dominico d'Ancona, as the crown or King of Beards,

    A Beard the most singular
    Man ever described in verse or prose;

    and of which Berni says, "that the Barber ought to have felt less reluctance in cutting the said Dominico's throat, than in cutting off so incomparable a Beard." But Southey is outdone by a story told by Dr. Ehle in his work on the hair, where mention is made of two seven-foot giants with Beards down to their toes, at the court of one of the German sovereigns. They both fell in love with the same woman, and their master decided that whichever should succeed in putting his rival into a sack, should have the maiden. One of them sacked the other after a long duel before the whole court, and married the girl. That the pair lived happily afterwards, as the Novelists say, is proved by their having as many signs of affection as there are in the Zodiac; and it is worthy of remark, both physiologically and astrologically, that the whole twelve were born under one sign, Gemini.